Getting well means getting things done

It's been ages since I posted here, but that's because I've been busy. I've thought about posting here and about what I might want to post, but I never got around to actually writing about anything. But now it's past midnight and I've got a million other things to do, so what do I do? Post something here. This past year has probably been one of the busiest years I've had since I first started attending RI meetings in 1999. I can't believe it's been 14 years. I'm working more hours now than I have since before I began RI (for a few years I didn't work at all, just attended RI meetings -- sometimes that is the best thing a person with severe nervous symptoms can do for herself or himself). Since graduating with a master's degree and starting part-time work, I've gone from working 5 hours a week to working 12 to 16 hours a week. My son is almost ten and he keeps me working, too. We just spent a day at the park with our homeschooling friends and I didn't get home till after 6:30 p.m. Then it was on to making dinner, reading, and bedtime. I then spent an hour responding to emails and sending emails for various responsibilities I have. And now I'm thinking of applying for a full-time job. Jobs in my field evaporated in 2007 (the year I graduated, of course), so when I saw a job listing last week for something that looked viable, I started thinking I might have a chance even if 50 other qualified people also apply. I've also taken online creative writing classes for the past few years, and now I spend time journaling and writing short stories. Long ago, perhaps at my first or second meeting, I heard someone say, "We don't wait to get well to do things, we do things to get well." I pondered the meaning of that for a long time. I wondered how I could do things without getting well first. It took me a while, but I realized I was using backward logic. If I sat around waiting to get better, I'd never get better. If I did things, ignoring my symptoms or spotting on them so they didn't work me up, I proved to myself that I could do things and then did more and more things until I functioned. I still have symptoms, but I spot on them and don't give in to what Dr. Low called the "defeatist babble of the brain."

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