Nervous Girl

Lately, the attendance at my meeting has dropped. When I started my meeting, about 6 to 8 people attended. During the summer attendance dropped, but it increased again around Thanksgiving. This past year the pattern has remained the same -- sort of, anyway. Last night at my meeting, no one attended except me. I sat in the room, listening to the sound of silence and the occasional chirp of a cricket. After half an hour, I decided to go home. As I drove home, I had fearful thoughts. Maybe people didn't like my meetings, maybe the meetings were boring or I was boring, or they liked the other local meeting that takes place on a different night, or . . . and so on. Then I decided to come up with secure thoughts, thinking back to meetings I've attended for the last fourteen years. Attendance always ebbed and flowed, depending on the time of year (holidays, summer, spring break), the weather (too windy, too rainy, too hot), or any number of other variables in the outer enviro

It's been ages since I posted here, but that's because I've been busy. I've thought about posting here and about what I might want to post, but I never got around to actually writing about anything. But now it's past midnight and I've got a million other things to do, so what do I do? Post something here. This past year has probably been one of the busiest years I've had since I first started attending RI meetings in 1999. I can't believe it's been 14 years. I'm working more hours now than I have since before I began RI (for a few years I didn't work at all, just attended RI meetings -- sometimes that is the best thing a person with severe nervous symptoms can do for herself or himself). Since graduating with a master's degree and starting part-time work, I've gone from working 5 hours a week to working 12 to 16 hours a week. My son is almost ten and he keeps me working, too. We just spent a day at the park with our homeschooling f